i've never believed there was one soul mate in this world for me. and if i ever did want to believe it, i knew i would never end up with that person. it's not realistic. what i do believe is there are people in this world that i am compatible with; a select few more than the numerous others. and compatibility is only what helps give a relationship the ability and desire to progress. whether it will, is entirely another issue. that being said, i understand now what it feels like to have a base compatibility to grow on.
i know there are issues still, things are not perfect. but, they're worth working through because the rewards that are possible in this kind of partnership could bring me things i never dreamt were realistic. i've opened up. i've shared things i never felt comfortable doing before. i've acted in ways i've always wanted to; or maybe never knew i wanted to because it was never okay. and, for this, i am grateful.
i do know, still, that i have a ways to go. i still hesitate. in my exploration and feelings of safe-ness, i still worry about pushing too far. sharing too much. the imaginary line is there somewhere, in the dark, and i fear stumbling across it at high speeds. the safe cushy landing on the otherside of the line? i think it's there. i hope it is.
Monday, June 9, 2008
posted by Mar at 8:42 AM
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